For those who don't know, I am a single mother living in South Africa. Simone Jasmine Ray is my only daughter and she was born on 4 May 1998. She is almost 24 months old and we're still a nursing couple. I never thought that nursing a toddler would be this satisfying, but I'm glad I stuck with it long enough to find out. I plan to nurse for as long as she wants. Notwithstanding the many benefits of breastfeeding, it is a wonderful way for her and I to reconnect when I get home from work.

I currently work as co-ordinator for a small NGO in South Africa that does InService training of Primary Science Teachers. We have also created a range of exciting multi-media classroom tools for learners to use and explore the world of science.

It's strange that I work in this environment as I actually studied drama at University. I call myself a jack-of-all-trades. I've been a stage manager, production manager, bar-lady, published poet, actress, film-maker, administrator, and while all of this has made for a really exciting life, I am proudest of all to call myself mother. It is also undoubtedly the most responsible and long-term position I'm ever likely to hold.

I rely a lot on my instinct when it comes to parenting Simone, but I also find validation for those instincts on the web. That's why I've included some of my favourite links below.

Because Simone was born on our bed it felt natural that she should sleep there with me. I wasn't even conscious that I was making a parenting choice. It was just easy and practical. Now we still co-sleep for most of the night.

When I was pregnant, I knew that I wanted to give breastfeeding a try. In her first few minutes in this world Simone latched like an expert and she's never really left the breast, not for extended periods anyway. I know that I was lucky though, not to have too many of the early breastfeeding problems that do occur.

I remember the night my milk came in. I was sitting in my lounge with my mother, nursing Simone. Suddenly I felt this hot, tingling rush that sent a flush through my entire body. I'd never felt anything like it. I was amazed that my body could keep this strange sensation secret from me for 30 years. I suffered no engorgement, I think mostly due to the fact that Simone was such a voracious and lengthy nurser in the early days. I remember trying to log our feedings as a record, but gave up when I couldn't figure out when a feeding ended and a new one began.

I'd been given a front carrier at one of my baby showers and soon discovered how easy it made life. I could go for walks with Simone bundled closely against me and she always slept deeply in the sling. I still spend a lot of my time carrying her and often strap her to my back 'African Style' if I need to do stuff with my hands.

Some people advised me against picking Simone up and carrying her all the time; "You can't let her get used to your arms all the time." they said. I nodded but there was no way I couldn't pick her up and hold her when she was awake. She was very easy-going and we soon fell into a real synchronicity. I KNEW when she was hungry or uncomfortable before she had to vocalise. Her needs were always met and she was a very healthy infant so I was stunned the first time I heard her cry when she received her 6 week immunisations.

I loved being home with Simone and dreaded the day that I would have to return to work. I didn't want to stop breastfeeding her just because I had to go back to work, but procrastinated about finding concrete ways to continue breastfeeding. Finally, a week before my return to work, I called my midwife and she referred me to a Medela dealer. I bought the Medela mini-electric breastpump, as the PIS hadn't been released in SA then, and also it would have been way too expensive.

The dreaded day came and I had a good few bottles of EMM (Expressed Mother's Milk) in the fridge. I had no idea how much Simone would take while I was away, so I also mixed a bottle of formula 'just in case'.

When I came home that evening, Betty, the nanny, told me that she'd given Simone the bottle of formula that afternoon as she knew the EMM could last in the fridge but she wasn't sure about the formula. Simone looked fine and totally unfazed by the almost 9 hour separation, so we settled down to nurse. After the feed, she posseted, what seemed to me, a huge amount of milk. Then she posseted again. Then she began to retch and vomit. I tried to nurse her and she half latched and fell asleep. I began to panic at the limpness of my normally wriggly girl. She woke only to vomit and cry weakly, then she would fall asleep. I called my friend Donne who rushed us to the emergency room.

There Simone was examined by the intern on duty who could find nothing obviously wrong with her, but prescribed antibiotics anyway.

By now I was convinced that the formula had caused the reaction, and I left the hospital (without filling the prescription) vowing that never again would formula touch my daughter’s lips (either going in or coming out). I have been very lucky that I was able to made good on my vow. I've pumped my way through 2 mini-electric’s and just recently retired my Avent Isis breastpump.

I love nursing my daughter now more than I did when she was little. When she asks for "some very yummy titty" after a day's separation and settles down on my lap I am eternally grateful that I mother at the breast and I know that I'm doing the right thing for both of us.

Still not convinced about the breastfeeding thang?